Helen

How are you feeling today?

Today I am much happier with my life. There are spaces that I haven’t filled and probably never will but I am more at peace with that now. Grief still comes whizzing round the corner when you least expect it, but I have the tools to make it pass more quickly now. Many people have hidden sadness for other reasons, this is mine and I feel as though I own it now.

What are you most proud of?

Getting through all the crap! Having suffered from severe endometriosis, I am proud that I got through all the pain, fighting for treatment, problems at work and inability of others to understand what living with this disease was like and I survived. I am proud that I made it!

What is your biggest learning in life so far?

I know it sounds cliched, but not to judge others. From the outside people can look fine but that doesn’t mean they are. Give people space to confide if they want and listen without judging. (I don’t always get this right, but I try!)

What are your hopes for the future?

To enjoy life, to worry less and to not be old and lonely if I can help it.

What would you tell your younger self?

Don’t spend too much time worrying about things that you cannot change, fight for the things that you can change and take time to look after yourself.

When or where are you happiest?

At home with my husband and cat or with good friends and family.

What would you like to say to wider society?

Please don’t judge me because I don’t have children, this was not a life choice but one that was forced upon me. Try and understand my life as I try to understand your life. We can all learn from each other as I may have skills that you don’t have and can share those with you.

I am happy to listen to you talking about your children and grandchildren, but not all the time, there are other things that we can chat about and find common ground.